Tommy Wiseau takes on the Nostaliga critic... the fuck!?

You don't fuck with the Nostalgia critic bitches

Or he might review you!

For over two years now the Nostaliga critic, aka Doug Walker, have been an ever growing enternet celebraty, his site probably one of the most popular underground geek sites in existence, he takes on all kinds of old movies and makes fun of them for being bad. He have taken on all the major companies. Dreamworks, Warner Brothers, Disney.. bla bla.

Big companies which really have better things to do then even taking notice of him.

Tommy Wiseau, independet film maker and maker of one fictionel movie "The Room" from 2003.

Based on book he wrote which nobody wanted to release and the play based on the same bookwhich no one wanted to put up, so he made it into a movie.

And the movie have a whole cult following, but only because it's so bad.

It is famouse for being bad, private cinema's is screening this thing for entertainment while selling rotten tomatoes and buckets of bad popcorn the audience can throw at the screen, apparently it's that bad, and the only reason why anyone watches the movie.

It's so bad that's it's ingeniousely entertaining.

So last week after several request Doug Walker made a review of it, it is the first review he had to take down because the movie maker himself demaneded it to be removed.. the fuck?

Holy shit, that is absolutly hillariouse! that's gotta be the funniest most entertaining thing to ever happen to the "Thatguywiththeglasses" site.

Today Doug Walker responded to that by parodying Tommy Wiseau himself in a sketch that trashes Wiseau badly, It was ingeniously awesome, but I god damn hope Doug Walker knows what he is doing.

For does of you who dosn't know "the Nostalgia critic" nor his site, go check it out right now, his site is awesome, and what is happening right now could evolve to anything. it could stop right now, but Wiseau could also pursue it, which would be strangely awesome.

the site is called. http://www.thatguywiththeglasses.com/ check it out.

The Phantom of the Opera, from then to now.

Hi's there the phantom of the opera!

Beware the Phantom of the opera!

We'll. kind off seems I wont have access to a computer tomorrow, so two articles today.

I love Phantom of the opera, but boy, what a girly thing to review. but at least it isn't quite as stupid as stuff like "Twilight" and other teen flicks. and it both have a sense of drench full horror and class above it. awesome!

Phantom of the opera was originally a book written in 1909 by Author Gaston Leroux.
The book is really not the best book in the world, I read it and completely expected a devastating tragic love story with a flinch of creepy stalker ghost story. as that Is what I get from the many adaptations.
What I did get was another detective mystery book where we see everything from the perspective of the character "Raul" the most hated character in the phantom adoptions, and he is equally hated in every single adoption despite being the good guy, I will explain exactly why in a moment when we get to the summary.
Button line is, the book just isn't very good, it's now downright bad, but it's a very bland and long read and not nearly as interesting as it's own legacy.

What the story is about is the opera house in the middle of Paris. Christine Daae is a singer in that opera house and have for a long time taken lessons by the mysterious phantom who is madly in love with her, he is fine with just giving her singing lessons until Christines old childhood sweet heart Raul appears and starts dating her, where after the phantom gets insanely jealous and all hell breaks loose.
you see as it turns out the phantom is a horrible disfigured man living in the dungeons of the opera and hiding behind mask, is a genius in almost everything but is also completely mad and a murder. he sports the cape and mysteriously disappearing acts, he plays the organ and the hypnotic voice, the insanity and is bloody dangerous, he is the stereotype of the kick ass bad guy, awesome!
But he is just so interesting and human that every girl phantom fan have a crush on him, dude he even got a cape, a romantic giving side and can play the organ, he is just sexy and we kind of fell sorry for him that his so lonely. Raul is always mr perfect, young, beautiful, charming and giving and really really boring. which is why every phantom fan girl in the world hate him for taking Christine away. Anyway, adaptations!




funny how the early adaptations always seems to be the definite version in the fan base's collected concious. that does in any case very much apply here where the silent 1925 Phantom of the Opera with Lon Chaney in the title role is regarded the definite thing.
Who can blame the people who thinks that? this movie is awesome and differently worth for anyone to check out. Though I must say right now, I own three different copies of this film and they are all different. when you go and watch it, if you watch it, make sure to watch a copy with a good soundtrack, the soundtrack on the free version in the internet is pure crap, and the good sound track make all the difference in the world.
Though it do kind of bother me, that one copy I do have with good soundtrack doesn't have the coloured versions of the two scenes that are some of the first techni colour film scenes ever made.
One of the big masquerade scene that is all colourful and looks awesome as the guests are dancing around in all these imaginative animal costumes, and of cause the phantom in his red death costume. It just looks awesome in colour.
Anyway, movie! this is one beautiful and moody film. it's a ghost story and a romance. it is creepy and it's tragic. the atmosphere in the room is that of a fairy tale, not to mention Lon Chaney's make up is really good, and makes him look really scary, his face looks sort of like a skull or something.
amazing film, if your a fan of the silent era and like stuff like "Nosferatu" or the silent "Jekyll and Hyde" you simply mustn't cheat yourself of this.





in 1943 another Phantom of the opera film was made, this time with Claude Rains, mostly known from the invisible man (1934) and Casablanca, in the title character.
For some reason this movie actually won an Oscar for best movie, I have a hard time seeing where that Oscar came from. this is not that good a movie and it's differently not that good a phantom movie. Claude Rains is a really odd casting choice for the Phantom, especially his small height makes it seem weird, all though his voice is awesome and fits the phantom well. The film is not really that creepy, it's not really that suspenseful and the romance almost non presence. all though the movie have it's really tragic elements. in this the phantom is more a victim than anything else as we actually in the beginning of the movie witness his fall from grace, and this is also where the origin of him being burned by acid instead of just being born disfigured started.





in 1962 it was the Hammer companies turn to bite into Phantom of the opera.
Now, Hammer is a late British horror film company, who adapted all the classic horror tales. Dracula, Frankenstein, Doctor Jekyll and mr Hyde. They did them all, and they did them in a very delightfully horrifying and gore filled way. really putting the horror back into the genre.
Why on earth does their version of the Phantom of the opera then seem like such a tame affair.
There are few traces of the good nasty Hammer gore feast and creepiness. and again the romance is non present. in fact it's written completely out of the story, there isn't as much as a hint towards it.
Not to say the movie haven't got it's cool factors, like the inserted villain, though despite of evil and slick he is. The phantom is the villain, so you shouldn't have to put another one in. well, in this movie the phantom is even more a victim than the Claude Rain version, and this Phantom couldn't even hurt a fly, what a bore.





in 1986 Andrews Lloyd webbers musical stage version of the phantom of the opera opened for the first time, this is probably the version most people is familiar with as it still lives and have become truly a classic. and it is awesome!
everything that is good about the phantom is in this musical and is used. The danger, the ghost story, the romance, the tragedy, the mystery and element of magic. not the mention the extremely grand music score. I saw this show twice in west end and once in a Danish production, and it's still just as awesome. cause it's just such a ride to watch, you just fell with this thing.
And people who says Andrew Lloyd Webber's music is bland clearly haven't seen this musical... all though with Stuff as "Cats" and "Star Light Express" behind him... I don't blame them.







The 1989 Phantom of the opera movie.
Freaking Robert Englund Freddy Kruger as the Phantom! need I say more.
well yeah, I do. two lines of description is hardly enough, I gotta make it at least ten.
This movie is really cool, it's kind of weird. sometimes in a good way sometimes in a bad, but really cool. It does not have the romance in it, but the dark edge and horror element is totally present plus it's such a good looking movie. whit great mystery elements in it, it's differently worth checking out for any horror fans.
plus, Freaking Freddy Kruger as the Phantom!




"Il Fantasma dell'opera", or just plain English Phantom of the opera 1998.
It's stuff like this that makes me sympathise with the nostalgia critic. THIS MOVIE SUCKS!
it's made by Dario Argento which is known for his gritty horror films, and so this should be a good edgy film. though, the horror is dump and disgusting more than anything else, the romance likewise so, the phantom isn't even disfigured, though as disgusting as ever. dude, there's a scene where he shows sexual pleasure by stuffing a rat into his pants, Christine who is by the way played by Argento's daughter is totally sexualiesed in the most disgusting non senses way, her feelings towards the phantom as he is suddenly totally in love with him makes absolutely no sense, he treats her horrible and then claims hi loves her, and she wants to stay with him.
I mentioned twilight before in this article, well this movie is way worse than twilight for kind of the same reasons. it just sucks, don't bother with it.



most recently in 2004 Joel Schumacher made the film version of Andrew Lloyd Webbers stage play. this movie is... really not living up to it's potential. it's so boring and plane, it looks way to clean and not edgy at all, the Phantom is really miss cast. (girls I know Gerard Butler is hot, but doesn't changes the fact that he was miss cast) You should think it would be easy as Joel Schumacher already had the script and incredible score in his hands, and just needed putting pictures on it. but all the cool stuff in the franchise and stage play, which is kind of edgy, he toned down and made way to clean. Like the Phantoms red dead costume at the masked ball, it's the most boring and clean cut Phantom/red dead costume I have ever seen.
The movie have its moments, and especially for girls the plain romantic music can get to you. but for an adaptation of one of the greatest stage musicals ever produced, it's just not good enough.





and then this yeas Andrew Lloyd Webber had all the fans of his original phantom of the opera musical enraged as the sequel "love never dies" had its opening at west end.
Have anyone ever done a stage sequel to a stage show? I have never seen it done before, and Ive had my eyes on stage shows for a long time.
Anyhow, I haven't seen it, just thought I would mention it. I listened to the soundtrack, it both have really good numbers in it and numbers that fall short.
Plus the most hardcore awesome musical number Andrew Lloyd Webber have ever composed, it's just so extraordinary awesome, and I would so kill to see it being used in a phantom movie. The song is called "Beauty underneath" it's on youtube. I implore everyone to just check it out, you will never think of Andrew Lloyd Webber the same way again.


And so on this ending note, this is another thing that I don't think will ever die. it's just a matter of time before another adaptation will see the light of day. I actually haven't covered all the versions I know of the Phantom of the opera in this article, there are books, other stage plays, television movie and cinematic spoof kind of movies I haven't even mentioned, the material is awesomely big, and fortunately is keeping on growing.
The next time I have access to the computer we will talk about "Darkman" which is a movie that in many ways reminds me both of Phantom of the opera, and the classic secret identity disguising hero, which is why I wanted to cover does two aspects this quickly. see yah around, hopefully.

The Scarlet Pimpernel, from then to now.

They seek him here
They Seek him there
Does Frenches seeks him everywhere
Is he in heaven? or is he in hell?
That damned, illusive, Pimpernel.

I ask of you, how many swashbucklers have a poem about them self which is actually from their first original appearance over a hundred years ago and have the purpose of mocking once uttered.

So with such an ancient old character, do he have like a secret underground fan base... not what I know about. in fact, as far as I know nobody knows who the Scarlet pimpernel is, ecxept for really dusty littérateur professors, and very cultivated people who also likes stuff like "Cyrano de Bergerac" "Romeo and Juliet" and "Les Miserables."
All of which are good stories in their own right, especially Cyrano which one of my favourite stories of all time, but it isn't exactly what a mainstream audience want to go watch.

And when talking the Scarlet Pimpernel, that is such a shame, as he truly is the first hero ever to sport the secret identity of a incompetent fobish prince cheesecake, also in front of the love of his life which is in this case his actual wife, to fool the enemy and go one heroic dangerous crusades under the alias of "The scarlet Pimpernel."

The Scarlet Pimpernel is really starting to become and old character, he was created in 1902 in a book by Baroness Emmuska Orczy, and it was quickly turned into a stage play.
She wrote several books with the figure, but only the first one have been adapted and is the one which is considered the classic.




The book is kind of written like a mystery novel, where Marguerite, the hero's wife is the actual main character and we see everything from her point of view as she unravel the mystery about her husband and eventually take matters into own hands.

so, summary.
The Scarlet Pimpernel concerns the French evolution where the French noble was taken prisoner and decapitated by the guillotine for their single crime of being French noble, and it was everyone. Men, women, children, people who was under suspicion of hiding or just being in contact with nobility, having a noble grand aunt. and this is real history folks.

Sir Percy Blakenly is a English nobleman, and therefore have quite a lot of French friends of nobility, so he decides to something about it as he collects a gang of friends around him and create the alias of the scarlet pimpernel, so he through disguised and planning can smuggle the French nobility out of the country and to England where they are safe.
The Scarlet Pimpernel have been marked French's enemy number one, so carefully planning even more cunning disguised are in other, at the same time as Percy must at all cost keep his identity secret.
It's the stuff of great adventure, and it is. great fun story, and I only got 3 bloody different adaptations to talk about. man that sucks, but oh well. lets get started.




The most famous adaptation if the scarlet pimpernel, and what is considered the definite version would be the Leslie Howard "the scarlet Pimpernel" from 1934.
It's a great fun movie, all though it's not as much an action movie, as it is an adventure movie of wits. actually its not an action movie at all, there are no stunts and no sword fighting. Percy is purely fighting with his wits using elaborate cunning plans, incredible disguises and impersonations plus fooling the entire French police was to think he is the most incompetent fobbish person in all of England and French.
It is differently my favourite scenes in the entire movie when ever Percy stands as himself, in his noble clothing just beside the French police, and talk with them with his fobbish voice.
The really interesting thing about these scenes is how much he is mocking the French police force, they don't know that they are being mocked as they just find him incredible annoying, but believe me, they are.
His disguises when being in French, like when he plays an old hag, or a stupid farmer is just delightful. to see what he planned on how it's set into work is just great fun. not to mention the movie climax which is purely a battle of wits between Percy and sir Chauvelin that goes on for around 5 minutes. and it is nothing but the two of them standing in a room constantly trying to outwit each other, it really proves you don't need great action and explosion to have tension, that scene have it fully.

as sequel "Return of the Scarlet Pimpernel" was made and released in 1937, it kind of sucked. what more can I say?
It's about Chauvelin trying to get revenge by kidnapping Percy's wife and Percy must pursue him. There are no fobbish persona, no great disguised, no elaborate plans. just boring suck about a man trying to get his wife back, we seen that a thousand times before, just tell it fun and well in a Pimpernel fashion and it would have been cool, but no.





Then there is the British television movie "The Scarlet Pimpernel" from 1982.
And what can I say about that? it's an extremely faithful remake of the 34 movie, which is both good and bad. It's good because this movie is just as good as the old one, it follows the same formula, Percy do pretty much the same things, and the actor playing Percy carries it out beautifully and fun, but it's not better than the Leslie Howard movie either, cause it's the same thing. Well, this movie have Gandalf as the villain, and Ian McKellen is always good in whatever he is in, in fact every actor in this is good. but what can I say I did not say about the 34 movie?
anyhow, if you like adventure and disguises, it's worth checking out.




A short British mini series of the scarlet Pimpernel was released in 1999. I have heard it should be really good. but I have no idea for myself as I was never able to get a hold on it.
What I have seen from it it seems okay, Percy don't seem to be as much fun as I am used to, but who am I to judge when I havn't seen the connection of his actions.





I'm sorry. but I am a musical person. I love a good musical.
you see, musical are like movies, there are really good musicals and there are many really bad musicals. and people tend to think all musicals are bad because that one thing they saw was a bad high school production.
As far as I am concerned, the Scarlet Pimpernel musical from 1997 is a really good musical.
It's bloody funny and adventurous. the music is big and great, the plot is as adventure as ever. they even have a good sword fight or two in there. mocking and disguises. it's just great. Percy is really written as one of the best comedian parts in the century and everything about it is just fun. just to show you how funny and awesome this musical is, check out this scene from the original production. Both what happens before and after the song.
Before Maugurite, Percy's wife who doesn't know that Percy is the Pimpernel rushes the the Pimpernels rescue to warn him that Chauvelin is on the way, and Percy takes the uppertunity to start questioning her.
After the song, the villain Chauvelin actually catches Percy red handed, so Percy must use his wits to get out of it.. which he does... quite brilliantly.




So, 1999 was the last time the pimpernel made an appearance, and that was only in a small mini series. that's over 10 years ago.
Is he dead and gone from the mainstream medium? I really don't know, but I sure don't hope so.
I am one of the few who are really for remakes and adaptations of this really old stuff, and especially the Scarlet Pimpernel I would so want to see have a shine in Hollywood.
If I myself could pick exactly what movie should have the green light in Hollywood, that would be it. and I am all for turning it into a swashbuckling adventure ala Pirates of The Caribbean, as long as you remain it fun.
Hell, with 45 minutes of extra screen time (The average movie in the 30's was only like 60 minutes) you can easily put in some sword fighting and elaborate chases scenes. I am all for it.

Avatar The Last Airbender, a good recent television cartoon? really???

Well, I was actually planning to write about the Scarlet Pimpernel today, but I had completely missed the new "The Last Airbender" movie had US release this week, as it will not be available for me in cinemas for another month, since this would be a Danish release, which both means I must wait for official European release (why even bother making the dates different, you are just enhancing internet piracy -_-; ) and they need to make subtitles and stuff like that.
So I think the slip is rather forgiveable, even though I am a major fan of the television show.
And because I am such a major fan, wouldn't it be nice to talk a bit about it?



Well, you know how people complain children's cartoon have gotten stupid through the last ten years, today people are constantly looking with longing eyes back in the 90's at such intelligent shows as "Batman the animated Series" "Gargoyls" "X-men the animated series" "The Red Diva" and other really cool stuff.
Even the more light hearted shows as "Darkwing Duck" "The Pinky and the Brain" and "Scooby Doo" which quite frankly seems like a bit of spoofs towards the huge serious mainstream, seems in the eyes of nostalgia far smarter than what the small kids are forced to watch today.
however, lets stick with the serious cartoons as "Batman" that I addressed first, this was some cartoons which took itself darn seriously, and give it all. to watch these shows you kind of forget it's a children's cartoon you are watching, and the moods, heart and effort put into it really smithereens. and even today stands up as a classic because of the great story telling and fantastic mood.




Avatar The last Airbender is also that good, it really is that good that you'll forget it's actually a children's cartoon you are watching. brilliant writing, animation and heart makes this an outstanding series. though also with a very light hearted element as jokes a littered out on the field and it's a show that is not afraid of making fun of itself.
It's also a show very well though through with a three seasons story arch and major character development throughout the story, no one leaves being the same as they entered. and stuff really happens, develops and is never dismissed. in that aspect, this show is actually even superior to Batman Tas, where there was hardly never any real character development, well would happen occasional, which is what made the show so great, but only on occasion.
It's the core of Avatar the last airbender. in the first season there is only like 3 or 4 filler episodes, rest is there to in a clear connection to the main story and main development, the second seasons lies most heavy on fillers with maybe half the episodes being so, while there are no fillers in the entire third season where everything comes together, it is a legitimate story arch.




So, well. summary I think. okay, that is pretty basic all though not the most uniqe thing in the universe.
We are in a fictional universe where the people are divided into four nations each having their own element. Air, Water, Earth and Fire.
Some people out of these nations are called "benders" and is capable to sort of bend the element representing their special nation, your born in the Earth nation you can inherit the gift to bend earth, your born in the wind nation you can have the gift to bend wind.
All though, around a hundred years ago the fire nation decided to be the third reich and conqueror the entire world.
Only one person would seem to have a chance to stop them which would be the avatar, a human incarnation of a guardian of the world, the only person who would ever be able to bend all four elements. only one avatar exist at the time, and when he and she dies the spirit will be reborn in a new human body. easy, so. but.
the Avatar have now dissapeared, and have been gone in a hundred years so the fire nation had free range to conquer the world, and is even pretty darn close to the goal now.
Sokka and Katara are these two water nation teenagers living on the edge of the south pole in a primitive tribe with few people residing as the fire nation already took away pretty much anything that could be dangerous about them. the men have gone and is most likeable even dead, when you leave a person like Sokka (teenager, thinks hi's an important leader, bad sense of humour, you know the type) you know your screwed.
Actually Sokka is a very smart and intelligent characters, plus he have an tremendous growth throughout the serious, anyhow. putting aside.




with me so far? good. so one day Sokka and Katara finds a little boy frozen into an iceberg and naturally releases him, as it turns out that little boy called Ang is actually the Avatar and have been stuck in that iceberg for the hundred years he have been missing.
Well great, we have the avatar back. the rest should be easy right? just make him beat up the fire nation a little and everything would be okay. WRONG!
problem is, that he is only a little boy and he can only bend that one element he grew up with "Air" plus he doesn't really have the mentally yet to be the great guardian and leader he is supposed to be. so the three of them together travels the world so he cab learn the remaining three elements and eventually defeat the fire lord.

Its a story that have been told a thousand times like before, the little boy who is "The one" with a tremendous power he cannot control but need to learn anyhow and need to become the leader in order to safe the world. nothing new about that at all.
What makes this so good is the way the story is told, the boy have personality and virtues he must over come, he is a pacifist and instead of just jumping morale dilemmas the show deals with them, a very interesting question which the show actually deals with in the darker episodes is when Ang now is such a pacifist, what is gonna do about the firelord when he faces him? while the pressure is one from everyone to just kill the firelord, its something Ang rather not do. plus it have the funny sarcastic light sight to it, with thrown in jokes everywhere and they are actually funny. even in the last big epic dramatic battle by the end of the third season, which is great and epic as should be, a little gag is thrown in where a fire soldier is sad that this his "The worst birthday ever"
No other show would throw in a gak like that, no show!




phew, okay. that's pretty darn straight and just out of the road but what the hell is that. when people review this sucker they actually tend to forget this little factor. because that major plot I just gave a summary off... is only half the main plot, we do in fact only spend like half the time with these three main characters. the other half of the time is where the writing gets really creative and unique, plus the largest developments happens here.
the other half of the time we spend with Prince Zuko, the son of the fire lord and his uncle.
hold one a second, the son of the fire lord? would that not make him the villain?
yeah, that's exactly what it makes him, and in the first season that is very much his purpose though strains of an anti hero is almost constantly present before in season two he pretty much is an anti hero.. character.. really hard the describe. but that's also what makes him so good and interesting. And he is a main character, otherwise we wouldn't spend that much time with him, it is literately half the time, and there are episodes where he have the greater focus. There are other villains who are more "the villains" in this show, in the first season it's commander Saroh, then it becomes Azula as the main villain, which is one Psychotic lady, and of cause we have firelord Ozai who is constantly spoken of from day one, and is therefore always spiritually present though first physical present in season 3, and that's just clever build up.



Okay, Zuko summary for season one. lets see if I can do this.
Here goes. Zuko is the firelords only son, though from the firelords point of view Zuko is nothing be a failure and a disgrace. after Zuko apparently disgraced himself some years ago the firelord actually banished him, and Zuko would only ever be allowed to return if he can capture the avatar. which he understandable become extremely obsessed about, and as the Avatar finally appears, his obsession grows as from his point of view he only need to capture Ang to make everything okay again.
Zuko is an extremely human character and multi layered. And for some reasons he is so likeable, I have no idea why. he is everything you normally hate in a character, he is loud, rude, obsessed, whiny, kind of stupid when regarding his obsession, sometimes self fish, dismissing and oh so extraordinary likeable. I don't know how the writers did it, the only reason I can think of that he is so likeable is because he is so human. all the emotions he goes through are extraordinary human and so is his obsession, plus his emotional and mental travel is of extraordinary and human proportions.

Again, this story have kind of been told before, and what makes it so great is that rather than avoid tough stuff and morales dilemmas, the writers go for it. Zuko makes bad decision throughout the show, but in other to realise does were bad decision and forcing him to do something about it, its a really interesting couple of episode in the end of second season start of third where he finally stands with what he thought he always wanted, but discovers that is not what he wanted at all, and he will now have to deal with it. And again, instead of having the writing avoiding such questions, they face them head on.
And no other character in history have been made that much fun with within his own show, the show is constantly making fun which him, which just goes to make him even more sympathetic.



And then new movie is coming out, what are my expectations? my expectation is that it will be gorgeous and beautiful to look at, I expect Bending battles between elements that will blow your mind because it looks so cool, as that is how it is in the cartoon, I need that in the movie.
but so much happen just in one season of Avatar that I do not see the story work to well without tripping over itself and cramp to much into small space.
The show have entire episodes dedicated to explain characters motivations and put up material that is vital later on, plus the show have created its very own universe with its own extremely unique rules. If they could make each season into 3 movies and in the end of the day have 9 movies, sure. I could see that happen and I could see it being awesome. but this is to much.
I will go and watch it though, the temptation is to great for me.