my obsession

There is always one element that have fascinated me above else in fiction.
When I write my stuff it's a theme that pops up again and again, and my best writing is dealing with it.
I don't know if anyone ever notices this when following a specific writer in any medium, every writer have his or her own obsession and it will be reflected in the movie they make. Tim Burton makes movie about the lost child and the outsider, Kevin Smith writes about all the madness that is to be found in everyday people, Christopher Nolan always writes about Reason vs heart, and how emotion easily corrupt, a theme highly present in his highly acclaimed "Batman, Dark knight" Also Steven Moffat current head writer of doctor who clearly have a obsession about people finding meaning via love, which makes him sort of a romantic.. and he love uses his time travel tool. Stephen King is all about the good minority of people in a world filled with madness and cruel blind adults who is most often in power, every single book he have ever written.

point just is, every author have a subconscious obsession that is present in nearly all their work, probably something they fells lacking on the screen, or in my case is beyond fascinated each time it happens I read or see something about it.
yeah if you haven't figured, this article will be a total self evaluation and analysis of what fascinates me, so If you don't like to read about that kind of stuff, fell free to move along, but it might help you to understand my other articles a bit better. And me, as the weird ass attention grapping person I am.
So far I have written large articles about "the phantom of the opera" "The Scarlet Pimpernel" "Zorro" and "The count of Monte Cristo" all having something to do with my great obsession, or at least part of the stories does. though my number one main obsession is lacking from this list as I haven't written about it yet, my number one obsession over them all is "Doctor Jekyll and mr Hyde" I am literately obsessed by this story.
Now, what do all these above mentioned stories have in common? and why are they all part of my unique obsession? Of cause even I can be sure, but I can try and I always do try.
It has a great deal to do about "identity" about how a man can have multiple identities, now my obsession does not lie in how the man is schizophrenic and experience this, but how the world around him is schizophrenic and discovers it.
How a character can walk among people who knows very well, but they do not see the man they usually see.
My up until now highest acclaimed written story, which was published in a adventure magazine last year "November 09" was a Zorro fanfiction, that in the first part dealt with his schizophrenic life and how he coped with being the zapped and disappointment of town by day, but a hero by night, yet his mind is always the same mind, it's only the world who looks at him differently. the second half of my story was about unmasking, where I had three individual unmasking each without having any physical mask to grap a hold on, one time where Diego (Zorro) just plainly tells his father straight out, one where he reveals himself to his girlfriend by first being his foppy self and then changing, and one time to the world where he confronts the enemy in public. though I suck at writing confrontations, I much better like to write about what all these characters are thinking about this unmasking, and I even get so much stuck in it that I often have to delete two thirds of my thinking segments to describe what is actually going on outside of the characters heads, and that's why I would be a bloody awful screen writer, I stink at writing genuinely physical action, though it fascinates me when a plot about masking goes up in a point.
In both Zorro and The Scarlet Pimpernel movies, my favorite scenes is by far when our hero stands around in a room and acts like a total and complete ass fooling everyone around him to believe he have the spine of a eel. and of cause the unmasking is what needs to be shocking and great for everyone, hence, why I find it very disappointing that in The Scarlet Pimpernel, everyone finds out by themselves and it gets sort of nice slow paced kind of revelation with not that more shocking but rather building up the plot as our Hero is walking into a trap and the danger increases as people find out who he is.
That's all very fine and well, I just better like the other obsession.
I swear to god, in no other franchise than doctor Jekyll and mr hyde have a seen more crappy movies, Ive seen a lot of stupid Frankenstein movies, a lot of Stupid Dracula movies and a lot of really stupid and crappy masked hero movies but Jekyll and Hyde really do take the cheese cake. perhaps it's because I am so obsessed by the franchise that I have tracked interpretations down for years, and it's probably the story I own most from, I just counted and I own 17 different Jekyll and Hyde movies, excluding Spoofs and there are is a god damn lots of them to... other than the Nutty professor.. which I like. anyhow.
The Jekyll and Hyde musical.. with David Hasselhoff of all people in the main role (god help me) is not bad at all, it's not my favorite version of the story at all, but it's entertaining.. and dear me, mr Hasselhoff can act oO;
One scene which I love I have not really scene in other places is doing to song "murder" which also kind of serve like an awesome on stage montage, in this interpretation dr Jekyll was pretty pissed from the very beginning at the other rich people because they won't let him go through with his experiments, as we all know he does it anyway. what I love about this sort of montage is that we see him as Hyde kill off all this people he was mad at as Jekyll. the people are asking "Why us, where do you know us from?" and he doesn't really answer as he just kills them joyfully sadistic way leave stage, and then appear as Jekyll in a more and more hysterical, scared and erratic stage before coming back as Hyde and killing someone else. I freaking love that, and I loved the following scenes where Jekyll walk among the remaining surviving rich people, and they all talk about protecting one another not knowing the man who murdered their friends is standing right in the room, Jekyll himself looks incredible unstable and scared. again, a person is standing in a room where no one but him realizes that he is the one that they want. brilliant.
both in the 1931 Frederich March movie, the musical I just mentioned and loads of other interpretations there is often a girl involved, sometimes two girls, but the particular girl I want to take about is the poor waitress who Jekyll finds attractive early one. when he unleashes Hyde, Hyde goes straight for her and forces her to be his woman, it's never really shown, but in many interpretations it's also indicated he rapes her. The next day Jekyll feeling guilty for all this sends her money and ask her to go far away, believing Jekyll is an Angel send from above, this girl instead of traveling away as asked to seeks out Jekyll and begs for help, not knowing she is begging the very same man who did her wrong, and it of cause all ends up in tragedy. I love scenes like that, so much is going on beneath the surface.
I love the entire idea behind "the count of Monte Cristo" when other people talks about this novel, they say it's about a prison break, I could not disagree more, for me the prison break is nothing but a setup for the real story and what is interesting for me, when our main Hero assume a falls identity and walks among the men who did him wrong, acting and pretending he only wants the best of all these rich gentlemen but is in reality planning for their doom in sophisticated ways. his enemies are freely telling him everything, yet he is not what they think he are. amazing story telling, and sadly enough, again I don't quite fell any of the movies I have seen dwell enough on this, the plot must go on.
I guess I just really love the idea of walking down the street and not being what people expect.
Of cause that is complete nonsense, as I walk down the street and no one knows who I am, in fact does who do care to take a glance at me would be surprised to talk to me as I look quite normal and ordinary, but is such a huge geek that I can talk of nothing but movies. that often takes people completely by surprise, but that is not my point.
It would be.. like imagine your an powerful alien, you know that you are this smart intelligent and powerful alien, it's your secret you walk down the street and no one else knows.
Oddly enough.. Doctor who which is my favorite show in the entire universe, have never dealt with this, at all. it have been mentioned now and then, I guess we can kind of find some "unmasking" around in the show where he tells people that he is alien, but it's never really dealt with that much, what is more disappointing to me that has never ever been deal with is the Doctors chance of identity. for does who don't know doctor who, what he is, is basically an alien with a time machine who goes on adventures in time and space, and he can't die, well sort of, when he does die he kind of regenerates, which means change of actor, but for the character means change of identity as well, it is implicated that is what happens, his whole identity changes all though not changes as he is still the same (confusing.. I know.. if you want to check the series out get use to it @_@) but they never really deals with this, they just move on with the stories... which is technically a good thing as a story should move on, that's good story writing. it just bothers me that they never deals with the aspect of a new identity as much as once.
There are loads of potential where the doctor could visit places he have been before that have emotional value to him, but chooses not to give himself away, and we could explore the feelings behind what happens. it just never happens at all.
A story I wrote to a sci-fi magazine was actually a doctor who fan fic, it almost got published but failed with the reasoning that it was too little doctor and too much my original character... looking at it now I totally see their point, the story is about the Doctor being trapped in somebody else's dream, in the beginning he does not realize where he is and tries to figure it out, the story around him evolves to be a conventional romantic Robin Hood sort of adventure, which on purpose almost becomes a spoof on the genre, there he meets the heroine, the dashing Scarlet Fox (yeah, that is homage to Zorro and the Scarlet Pimpernel) who fights the evil oppression of the poor, this girl seems to be just perfect. beautiful, dashing, funny, strong and agile, brave, admired and all that. and as it turns out she is the person who's dream the doctor is trapped inside, and he needs to convince her that it's all a dream, and she needs to give that dream up in favor of reality. in the end it of cause all works out all right.
The moment I like the best in my Story, and I still clearly see in my head, is when the Doctor and Donna in the end sees the heroine in the real world, and she is nothing but a gray mouse, very shy and silent, and mostly extremely awkward, a little plum always head bowed and so ford.
For does who are curious, the story naturally ends well, what I would mostly have liked it to end with, and what I would call "The real ending" is the doctor taking the gray mouse on board the Tardis so she have a chance to life the adventure she always dreamed off. the "official" ending however which fits into continuity, the gray mouse get really scared as the man from her dreams suddenly appears in her office, and she runs for it, realizing there is little to do, the doctor instead in a good gesture makes sure the book gray mouse have written, and have the same plot as the dream the doctor was trapped in, gets published. One morning she just suddenly finds a published copy with a note inside from the doctor, a rather sweet ending if I might be frank, not as good as the first one, but I am quite happy about it.
It's probably one of the most personal things I have ever written.
all the way back when I was only 15 I wrote my first short story which my Danish teacher had published in her school magazine, and it's kind of still as personal and steal dealing with identities, I don't even dare touch it and trying to rewrite it, despite it being full of stupid grammar mistakes.
The story is seen from two different peoples point of view, a girl called Maria who we mostly spend time with in School, and a girl called Christine, we mostly spend time with at a spare time theater grouped, each one of them knows a red haired girl. the red haired girl Maria knows from class is a shy silent and awkward girl, who is getting picked on and teased by the class.
The red haired girl Christine know from the theater classes is a fun, weird, spontainiuse and absolutely beautiful girl everybody admires. as the story transgresses it becomes clearer and clearer that the two red haired girls are the same red haired girl, she is just like two different persons depending on where she is and who she is with.
in the climax of my short the two worlds collides as the red haired girls class is going to see the very play that she is in, and they discover her on stage to go down in the pause at her sanctuary in the dressing room to tease, but as she panics and hits them hell breaks loose and they break her leg.
The story ends on that the parents immediately removed her from class and forbad her to continue at the theater class, so neither Maria nor Christine knows what became of the red haired girl as she just vanished out of their lives.
I was told in a writing class that an author can write about nothing but them self, the two stories I just mentioned are probably the stories I am the most proud of, but also most emotionally about, just referring the last story brings a tear to my eye because it's so personal. so what is this? am I really just a schizophrenic person? I sure as hell shouldn't release this on the internet, then again, what are the changes anyone is ever going to read this? not much I am sure. the two stories is about the same thing, a girl or a woman with two identities, one is the perfect ideal of who she wants to be, and how the world sees her, the other is who she dreads to be, and also how the world sees her. yet neither of the sides are either falls or untrue, both sides are true for my characters. and both are brimming with unrealized potential.
I kind of wished I was brimming with unrealized potential as well, maybe I am, I sure hope so. all though I doubt it, and sometimes I don't, sometimes I think I could do anything with myself and my life. I am really weird skizo person, but it's also a weird skizo world I am living where nothing makes sense. nothing at all.
And before hit the post button, I need to make aware it's the middle of the night while I am writing this, which probably explain lots of the really weirdo stuff I have just said. thankfully this is my blog, so I can do whatever the hell I want.
maybe one or two actually gained from this, in which guys I am surprised yet pleased, maybe if anyone have thought yourself through all of this thinks I am completely nuts. your absolutely right, I am nuts, but the idealized person in my head I want to be is as well, she is weird and funny, and I aim to be like her.